I love cryptocurrencies and I’m sure you do too if you’re currently reading this. However, the novelty and wildness of the very innovative and unregulated new world they are bringing forth leads to the fact that we’re almost constantly swimming in an ocean of shit. Because I’m a good guy and I know some of you actually have a life, I curated the news to deliver here the most precious events that occurred past weeks.
Dumpcry’s Diary is your new weekly dose of poop
Give me your money, worthless whinner
Let’s start with a funny story. If you’re used to ICOs, you know how it usually works. A project is launched with a bunch of cheesy advisers around a more or less possible promise, a PR team is hired and when you decide to join their Telegram group before the ICO, it is all hearts and super polite answers even to the most stupid or recurrent questions. This is absolutely normal, since they need your money and they need you to be happy so you Shill their project and make their token a valuable one. They are all running after a precious and magical item called FOMO. Except in some situations where the FOMO is so high that the project leaders just don’t care anymore.
Perlin was (and still is, but less) a very hyped project for no really good reason. It was everywhere on social channels at the pre-pre-sale stage and the few available reviews were rave despite the astounding lack of information about concrete things like who are the devs, where is the product that is supposed to have functioned on two thousands nodes already, etc. Perlin is essentially 3 “serial entrepreneurs” with a LOT of VC funds displayed on their website.
But crypto-investors are not so dumb and they finally started to ask for more information or even complain a bit about the shady aspect of the project. The only available information was coming from the quite useless whitepaper and a few suspicious articles. Bitcoinexchangeguide pulled a “we have no info about the project but it is very solid, prepare your ID for the KYC”.
Cryptobriefing made a hilarious “code review” of what seems to be the private Github of Perlin (because the public one was almost empty). It is very hard to understand what is going on in this article since the author shows absurd levels of excitement over what is nothing more than a bunch of very basic functions.
The review was so blatantly fake/paid that people started to complain, so the website published an update on top of an another rave review they made, saying that “Perlin scores were based on a couple of things that have not turned out to be entirely accurate”. In the meantime, seeing that maybe their PR strategy was going a bit too far, Perlin published a Medium article to basically say that it is normal there is not so much available useful information about their project, because they are way too ground breaking, and also that all the worries were spread by FUD groups, of course. As the only example of what is supposed to be an accurate analysis of their project, they quote… the code review from Cryptobriefing showed above!
This obviously didn’t stop the FUD on Perlin channels, until the CEO himself decided to prove the world that Perlin is absolutely not a scam.
Finance News Inc.
We recently published an article to talk about how CNBC, Bloomberg, CNN, Forbes, BBC, etc. were FUDing with no shame Bitcoin, alts and ICOs while promoting Ripple. We also covered in the past how CNBC is used to mislead its readers by advising them to buy Ripple or Bitcoin at the very top. Well, believe it or not, they did the same at the very bottom.
On July 12, when we are at one of the lowest levels since 2017 and also when the charts show the eventuality of a Bullish trend, Forbes publish an article named “How to short sell cryptocurrencies and why more people aren’t“. Between two pictures of smiling people who seemingly say “go for it, it’s safe ;)”, we’re learning that “It’s good to be short” and that betting against Bitcoin will have a positive impact on the currency (yes they really say that). But that’s level 1 bullshit only.
We could say that we reached the second level on July 13, when we learned that the evil Russian hackers used evil Bitcoin to buy all they needed to affect US elections outcomes. I never had a chance to read any Bloomberg’s article on how decentralized applications like Bitcoin could benefit legal applications, but if Russians are using it to influence western population, it must mean that it wouldn’t happen with fiat money then, right?
But level 9999 bullshit was reached by CNBC on July 17 in the morning. Just a few minutes before the big big green candle that got us out of the bear, they published an article named “Why bitcoin won’t bounce back, according to five experts“. They were so wonderfully wrong that they quickly changed the title to “Bitcoin is surging, but these experts are still skeptical” and the permalink to “bitcoin-cryptocurrency-digital-currency-ether” a few hours later. Recap below.
The mysterious RSK ICO thing is not dead apparently. Rootstock is a smart-contracts enabled layer for Bitcoin in development for years now. Despite the team members recently saying there is no ICO for RSK, many people pretending knowing people knowing personally someone in the RSK team say there is actually a funding round going on. A trustworthy person popped out on Telegram with an almost empty 300 BTC allocation today and it was not the first time during the last 30 days. Apparently, at least 90 investors were granted with allocs and many of involved investors say those allocations come directly from Diego, the CEO of the Rootstock project. There is even a “secret whitepaper” from which screenshots have been collected and distributed here and there on social medias. I sent a message to RSK team, we’ll see what they have to say.
Zcash developers are bragging about their money on Twitter. Earning around 350k$/month for two years now doing absolutely nothing thanks to the founders reward, they are delighted to buy things and not caring about the price. If you still watch the price when you buy food, create a coin.
Augur is a decentralized forecasting network who just launched its mainnet. So you can use it to bet on “the next election, short a cryptocurrency, or hedge against disaster”. But there is a problem: some people already opened bets on the death of well known people, paving the way to an eventual assassination market. Of course, like some people pointed out, we can now consider that Augur is already under the scrutiny of some US government agencies. What will be the outcomes? Nobody knows, but there is already a bet for this.
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